Council Officials Respond To Brash Claims

Local government officials have objected to being called ‘Little Hitlers” by ACT leader Don Brash.

Dr Brash made the comment during a speech at the Federated Farmers Annual Conference yesterday.

Dr Brash claimed that officials have used the Resource Management Act to prevent legitimate activity from taking place, and are behaving like tyrants.

Auckland Council planning officer Obergruppenfuhrer Jurgen von Ribbonspiel said the claim was outrageous and offensive.

“How dare he! I vill haff him keeled!”, said the Obergruppenfurher.

“Lies! All lies! I am not a little Hitler. I am six foot three tall, not some tiiny little untermenschen zwerg!”

However, Chairman of the National Socialist Resource Management Final Solution Committee, Gerd Heydrich, said the wording chosen by Dr Brash was unfortunate.

“It is a shame that this person of interest to us has chosen to use such an unfortunate turn of phrase. Let me assure the good Doktor that he has nothing to fear from our members.”

Herr Heydrich said he welcomed the opportunity to discuss Brash’s concerns personally.

“Doktor Brash, I say this to you. We are very alike, you and I. Let us cease this incessant squabbling over who is right and who is wrong.

“I would very much enjoy the opportunity to discuss the matter in the comfort of our offices. I am certain we can come to a suitable arrangement regarding this most unfortunate misunderstanding that has arisen between us. Once we have interviewed you I am confident you will be more understanding of our point of view.

“To faciliate these discussions I am sending a carload of my best men to your house this moment. Yes, I know it is three in the morning, but we council people are dedicated to our jobs and never sleep. Please pack a small suitcase with a change of clothes, as our discussions may take some time.

“Now please excuse me, but this media interview is at an end, as I have work to do. Do you think the train system runs by itself?