Grey Power National President Roy Reid has called for the introduction of compulsory military training.
Why now, you ask? Well why not?
As well as forcing all the ne’er-do-wells to get their hair cut and pull their pants up, CMT would make the streets safe for old people by giving all the most dangerous thugs in society access to weapons and military training.
It’s easy to mock the idea, but consider the benefits of having a well-trained citizen militia ready to take up arms for the nation at the drop of a hat. They could be used to defend the state against threats both external (the Chinese) and internal (Maori radicals, homosexuals, New Zealand-born Chinese, etc.), and they would be available for deployment in the event of a civil defence emergency (e.g. a massive tsunami caused by all 1.4 billion Chinese jumping up and down at the same time).
Apply CMT to other areas of endeavour and just watch the results! Climate change would cease to worry us if, instead of compiling data on the warming of our planet, scientists donned battle fatigues and conducted lengthy pack-marches across the Central Plateau. Those sciencey types simply wouldn’t have the time or the energy to scare us to death with all those climate change models.
And what about the current account deficit? Just send the Treasury boffins to the barracks, because it’s all mumbo jumbo anyway.
Let’s not fool ourselves that New Zealand’s problems are complex and difficult to address. They will all disappear the moment the stern boot of military discipline finds a few backsides to kick.
And what could possibly go wrong?