The Nation Interview Transcript

Here is a transcript of my interview on TV3’s The Nation this morning*

Duncan Garner: So what did you think of Don Brash? 

Me: It pains me to give credit to the man, but we should thank him for raising the retirement age question. Other countries have raised the age of retirement, and it is something we will eventually need to do, even if our current Government refuses to discuss the issue.

Did you know the Germans have just lifted their retirement age to 67? I’ve always been a fan of the German way of doing things.

Garner: That’s an interesting point of view.

Me: Don’t sound so surprised. Not all bloggers are mental midgets. I could so do your job.

Garner: It’s not as easy as it looks. You have to be good with people.

Me: You mean actually like people? I see your point. That could be a problem.

Garner:  Anyway, back to Brash. Do you think his plan to let people retire at 65 and receive a lesser superannuation amount could work?

Me: I can see problems with the proposal. If it’s largely fiscally neutral you’re not actually solving the problem, which is that people are living longer. Is it time to consider death camps instead?

Garner: What? Death camps?

Me: Yes, for those over a certain age. It’s reasonable to give people a few years of retirement, but once they start becoming a burden on people, let’s just get rid of them.

Garner: Like the Nazis did?

Me: Why is it that everything the Nazis did has to be attacked like it’s a bad thing? They weren’t all bad. For example they were sharp dressers, and their uniforms were definitely the smartest of all the armies in World War Two. Clothes maketh the man, as they say.

Garner: They also say “thou shalt not kill”. Are you completely insane?

Me: You know, a lot of people have asked me that. They weren’t so keen on my idea to close the income gap with Australia either.

Garner: Dare I ask, what was your idea?

Me: Launch a pre-emptive strike. Seize the entire east coast of Australia and force the population into slavery. Once Sydney, Melbourne and other centres of commerce are ours, we’ll have no more troubles with that income gap issue. And with the cheapest labour force in the world, we’ll be able to compete with China. It will be boom times for our manufacturing sector.

Garner: You are nuts. Of all the suggestions I’ve heard for closing the income gap with Australia, that would have to be the stupidest and most hare-brained.

Me: You obviously haven’t read the 2025 Taskforce Report then.

Garner: Good point.

*  When you hear people saying “don’t believe anything you read”, please think of this post.