I haven’t had time to analyse the Sky City deal in much detail, but it looks like a big win for taxpayers. Look at some of the benefits:

• The Auckland region will see four hundred thousand new visitors a week.
• The convention centre will bring $30 billion in revenues into New Zealand’s economy a month. A month!
• The income earned from high-rollers will enable Sky City to repay the nation’s public debt, which it has committed to doing by 2018.
• A million million billion new jobs over the next ten years.
• The Day of Judgement to be postponed until at least 2048. In the event of total apocalypse, Jesus has committed to giving favourable consideration to an extension of Sky City’s casino licence to include the Afterlife.
• Sky City to invest $2 billion in new technologies that will target problem gamblers, eliminate crime, reduce obesity, turn straw into gold, and bring peace to the Middle East.
• As part of the deal that cute girl on reception at your work will finally agree to sleep with you.

Well done, John Key!