What it all means for the Labour Party

Embed from Getty Images

It turns out that all those Labour voters who didn’t have landlines weren’t actually Labour voters.

Labour ran a fantastic campaign, but managed to go down in a historic defeat. These things cannot possibly be related.

Democracy is a really terrible idea, because sometimes the party I support does badly.

This defeat is entirely Kim Dotcom’s and Cam Slater fault, so there’s really no need for Labour to reflect, because it’s always someone else’s fault.

Oh, I forgot to blame the media.

Labour ran a fantastic campaign.

If David Shearer is the answer, we probably need to start asking some different questions.

It’s possible for Labour to win in 2017. It’s also possible that the next Labour prime minister is still at primary school. Or hasn’t been born yet.

There is always hope. John Key might eventually tire of the job after another five or six years in power.

Labour ran a fantastic campaign.

Labour must unify. If it does not present a united front, National will be in power for the next two terms. The only way for Labour to unify will be for those on the left/right to locate and destroy all internal enemies on the left/right. Let the fighting begin.

Labour ran a fantastic campaign.

David Cunliffe did nothing wrong. They crucified Jesus too.

Labour ran a fantastic campaign.