Cometh the hour…

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National Party List MP Nuk Korako is a passionate man. He cares deeply about the issues affecting the people of this country. That’s why he has a members bill before Parliament right now.

Mr Korako’s bill will make a huge difference to a group of people largely forgotten and marginalised by our society. People whose voices are almost never heard. You won’t read about the plight of these folk in your local newspaper, because our news media bosses reckon you would much rather read about celebrities and sporting stars.

Nuk Korako understands how tough things are for these people, and has decided to do something about it.

His Airport Authorities (Publicising Lost Property Sales) Amendment Bill will make the lives of airport lost property administrators, an already harassed and persecuted minority, just that little bit easier.

The bill’s explanatory note sets out very clearly the high stakes involved:

This Bill will amend the Airport Authorities Act 1966 to provide airport authorities with greater flexibility when publicising the disposal of lost property. It will allow authorities to determine the most appropriate way to advertise lost property to passengers rather than the restrictive and prescriptive methodology prescribed in the current Act.

This Bill keeps in place the intent of the Act, which is to inform passengers of lost property before the airport authority proceeds with the sale of or disposing of the lost property. This Bill expands the way an authority can communicate with passengers to more relevant methods.

In short, the bill removes the requirement for airport administrators to advertise the disposal of lost property in a newspaper. No longer will these good folk be forced to submit to the oppressively one-sided classified advertisement terms and conditions typically imposed by newspapers. No more for them the tyranny of the publication deadline. Now they can advertise airport lost property by other means. This is freedom, precious freedom. SWEET LIBERTY!

Good on Mr Korako for looking to solve a problem most of us didn’t even know existed. He’s a guy who understands that if you get the little things right, the big things will take care of themselves. Like the housing crisis. I predict he will go on to smaller and better things from here.

And if you’re reading this post, Nuk Korako, here are some of the little things bugging me. You have it in your power to do something about them.

  • Hats: I’d like to see a member’s bill that recognises that, in some situations, the wearing of a hat can be perfectly acceptable. I wouldn’t want our legislators to attempt to list the particular situations, because that would be way too nanny-state. A general statement of principle should suffice. (Disclosure: I sometimes wear a hat in summer).
  • How many spaces after a full stop: How much productivity has been squandered in debate on this issue over the years? There are entire websites forums devoted to discussing this issue. It’s time to end the controversy, to silence forever the two-space crackpots. Legislation on this issue would empower authorities to take a zero-tolerance approach towards double-spacing in literature.
  • Flossing: I’m always forgetting to floss, and then my dentist gives me a hard time. I’ve had it with being made to feel like a child by my dental professional. I’d love one of our parliamentarians to draft a members bill that addresses my inability to remember to floss. I’m not sure what the solution to this problem is, but if the bill was drawn from the ballot we’d at least be able to have a good debate.
  • Chip sizes: If you go into your local supermarket and open up a bag of potato chips, chances are the chips will come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. There’s also a good chance that supermarket security will ask you why the hell you’re opening up packets of chips you haven’t even paid for. While I’m not generally a fan of excessive regulation, particularly when it comes to our food, the people at Eta and Bluebird just don’t seem interested in providing the general public with a consistent product in terms of shape and size. Unlike the housing crisis, which is difficult and complex, this is an issue offering a very simple legislative solution.
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