Trouble over United Future caucus Christmas lunch

What happened when United Future’s leader tried to book a restaurant table for his caucus’ Christmas lunch?

A day in the life of Peter Dunne

7:04 am Do I? Don’t I? They’ll never find out if I do. Nobody will think to suspect me. 9:22 am Attended a business breakfast held by one of the local accountancy firms. I played with the idea once of being an accountant, but decided against it. Those guys are all too flashy for my…

Imperator Fish Nation: Dunne steps down from Revenue Minister role

By James Rowland(Click here for details of how you can contribute a piece to Imperator Fish Nation) There was shock today for fans of the long-running Government of New Zealand as the Revenue Minister, Peter Dunne, resigned.Internet speculation had been rampant for the past few days that Dunne might be leaving his role as the…

Solidarity!

David Carter’s decision, which may well be legally correct, is an assault on our basic freedoms because I disagree with it Today is a dark day. Mark down 6 June 2013 as the day when our democracy went to the dogs. Tell your grandchildren you remember when it happened. You were there. Tell them…

Transcript of Leader’s Keynote Speech: United Future Party Annual Conference

Ladies and gentlemen, firstly let me just say how much… Wait, I have to stop for a minute. I’m having trouble seeing my audience. This phone booth isn’t all that well lit. Where’s my torch? Ah, that’s better! Right. Ahem… Ladies and… No, it’s still no good. I still can’t see the audience. The mirror has moved…

Why I am quitting Labour

People who read my posts will know I have not been an uncritical supporter of the Labour Party. The party has struggled from one blunder to the next, and this tendency towards self-injury has driven much of the ongoing speculation about David Shearer’s leadership. Many of us have looked on in dismay as Labour tears…

What’s He Up To?

Only a few weeks ago he was the enemy, a despicable monster who had turned his back on the people of New Zealand. Now he’s being portrayed as a hero, ensuring that two progressive pieces of legislation will go to a second reading in Parliament. Peter Dunne may be up to something. He claims he…

Dunne In Stoush Over Caucus Lunch Plan

A fierce row has broken out between a Wellington restaurateur and United Future Party leader Peter Dunne, over a table booking for one of the city’s most in-demand eateries. The trouble began when Mr Dunne attempted to book a table at Wellington’s Acropolis Cafe for his caucus’ annual Christmas lunch. According to Mr Dunne the…

Can This Snail Be Saved?

United Future leader Peter Dunne has unexpectedly been appointed the Associate Conservation Minister. The announcement came today after the National and United Future parties signed a confidence and supply agreement. Dunne says he is looking forward to the new challenge presented by the Conservation role, and cites preservation of the endangered Giant Grey Snail as…

Minister Explains Kronic Decision

Associate Health Minister Peter Dunne AKA MC Pete Dogg Associate Health Minister Peter Dunne, AKA MC Pete Dogg, has announced a crackdown on “cannabinoid” substances, such as the synthetic cannabis product Kronic. The announcement came at the end of a gruelling tour for MC Pete Dogg and his backing group The Dead Possum Posse. Mr…